Understanding Emotional Regulation

What is Emotional Regulation?

Emotional regulation is the ability to manage and respond to emotions in a healthy way. It is an important part of healthy interpersonal relationships and mental well-being.

When people have good emotional regulation skills, they can stay calm during stressful situations, identify their emotions accurately, express their feelings appropriately, and easily adapt to emotional situations and triggers.

The Impact of Struggles with Emotional Regulation

  • Interpersonal Relationships

Lack of emotional regulation can lead to increased conflicts with others, including family members, friends and partners. When someone does not understand their emotions or cannot remain composed, it becomes difficult to communicate their needs and feelings. Without emotional regulation, individuals can experience difficulties building and maintaining relationships.

  • Goals and Values

Without emotional regulation, people can find it difficult to stay focused and motivated toward their personal goals and live within their personal value system. When a person loses track of their values, decision-making can become confusing and difficult, increasing negative emotions and stress. Ultimately, people begin feeling as if they are stuck and unable to move toward their long-term goals.

  • Overall Happiness and Mental Wellbeing

When someone struggles with regulating their emotions, they can experience frequent or intense emotional reactions that lead to feeling overwhelmed by daily stressors. These mood swings and overwhelming feelings greatly impact the ability to enjoy life.

How Can Therapy Can Help with Emotional Regulation?

Working with a clinician can help you recognize what you are feeling and understand what may be causing emotional reactions. Mindfulness techniques learned in therapy sessions can help you remain present while recognizing the emotions that come up for you.

When the nervous system becomes activated, we typically feel our emotions before understanding them. Therapy can help you understand how your body reacts to your different emotional responses and guide you through techniques to help calm the nervous system.

Working with a therapist can also help you identify triggers that activate your nervous system and lead to emotional outbursts. Learning and practicing strategies in and between therapy sessions can help you pause before reacting, giving you space to respond more thoughtfully and less impulsively. When you reduce your reactivity, you gain a sense of control in daily life and social situations.

Finally, although they do not feel comfortable, negative feelings happen, and they can provide important information about how we feel about others, our environment, and ourselves. Understanding that we cannot eliminate our negative emotions and learning how to tolerate these feelings can increase mental well-being.

Benefits of Improved Emotional Regulation

  • Better communication and reduce conflicts in interpersonal relationships.

  • A greater alignment with your personal goals and values.

  • Increased sense of mental well-being.

  • Better control over emotions, leading to more positive daily experiences.

Emotional regulation is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships, achieving personal goals, and enhancing overall well-being. Working with a therapist can provide the tools and support needed to improve emotional regulation, helping you feel more in control and content. 

If you’re struggling with managing your emotions, consider reaching out to our team to start your journey towards better emotional health.

Katie Lacelle, R.P (Q)

Hello!

My name Katie Lacelle (she/her), and I am thrilled to be a part of the Water & Stone team. I am a Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying) and a graduate student in the Master of Arts in Counselling Psychology (MACP) program at Yorkville University. I also hold a Bachelor of Arts in English Studies from Nipissing University and a degree in Early Childhood Education from Canadore College.

Everyone has unique strengths, and I aim to empower clients to tap into those strengths, explore their own stories, and embark on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth.

My own life experiences have profoundly shaped my desire to become a psychotherapist. I was diagnosed as neurodivergent later in life and am a parent of two neurodivergent children. This has given me a unique understanding of the neurodivergent community, especially those with ADHD and/or Autism. Therefore, I take a neurodiversity-affirming approach to therapy.

I have also experienced the difficult life transitions of divorce and blending families, giving me an understanding of the complexity of these relationships and the personal challenges that can come with these life changes. Living with chronic pain has granted me a unique perspective on resilience, coping, and the power of self-compassion.

I use an integrated approach encompassing various modalities, including person-centred, humanistic, Adlerian, strengths-based, and narrative therapy. I aim to create a warm, empathetic, and non-judgmental space where clients feel genuinely seen, heard, and validated.

I am eager to collaborate with you on your journey towards healing, resilience, and a more fulfilling life!

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